This week, please share road blocks to green living. For example, perhaps you'd really like to compost but don't. We'd like to know why. Maybe you don't recycle ... let us know why. We're looking for all the reasons for NOTadopting a green activity. If you're not struggling with any road blocks at this time, then please share ones which you've heard from others. For example, one of the most common reasons is that it's too expensive.
Then ...
Take a look at the road blocks shared and offer solutions. For example, to people who say green living is too expensive, we might share examples of how green living is actually frugal. The idea of this challenge is to help us all find solutions and "bust" all excuses for not living green.
Then ...
Take a look at the road blocks shared and offer solutions. For example, to people who say green living is too expensive, we might share examples of how green living is actually frugal. The idea of this challenge is to help us all find solutions and "bust" all excuses for not living green.
I know that I am not perfectly green by any means. There are lots of things, I'm sure, that I don't do and maybe should. What has been bothering me most lately is when I give in and do the not so green thing because of what someone else may think - including my children.
I wrote an entire article on how to Have a Green Halloween. In it I talked about costumes and how not to buy a brand new one each year. I was all set with this one in early October. My oldest daughter found a great Spanish Dancer costume at a yard sale. It was an old dance costume, well made and $1! My son decided he wanted to be Frankenstein. Great! I went to Savers (it's basically a huge indoor yard sale) and found a blazer for $4. I figured he could wear jeans and a T-shirt. I would figure out how to use old wine corks for those head bolts and just needed to look into some eco-friendly face paint. Two down, one to go. My youngest daughter decided she was going to be a witch and wear her sister's old costume. Yeah! I did it!!!!
Then, the two younger kids changed their minds. Less than 2 weeks before Halloween. I sort of brushed it off and thought I could convince them to go with the original ideas. No dice. My son now wanted to be a Ninja. Daughter #2 still wanted to be a witch but now refused to wear her sister's costume. Ugh! Now what?! Do I "force" them to wear the other costumes? How do I explain this to them so they want to reuse another costume? Why do they think a new, cheaply made costume is so cool?
I ended up giving in and bought 2 costumes. I consoled myself by remembering that my kids love to play dress up. These costumes would be used many more times. And when they were done, I could donate them to other children to use.
Update: I meant to explain a little more on why I gave in. As I re-read this, people may think my kids were being bratty and I gave in because of that. Not the case. For my son, he rarely asks for anything and is quite happy, most of the time, with whatever he is given. So when he expresses a real opinion on something, I want to listen to him and honor that request when I can. As for my daughter, she is the younger of 2 girls. As soon as she could express herself, she has copied her older sister on everything. As flattering as people might think this is, her older sister did not this flattering. Much tension over this exists. So, when she does express her own interests, no matter how small, I like to recognize and encourage her to be her own person. Now, I probably could have found a way for them to be what they wanted without buying brand new costumes. I did try, but couldn't find used ones and I am not terribly crafty so making them myself wasn't going to happen. So there you go!
There are lots of things my kids do that others may not - we use cloth napkins all the time (even for school lunches), they recycle, upcycle, have reusable water bottles and snack bags, etc. At times though I don't want to risk alienating my children or making them feel they are sacrificing just for my ideas. Of course, I hope these also become their ideas, but they may not.
As far as what other people think, I don't want to become that person. I rarely tell people about environmental issues unless asked. I don't want to come off as preaching even though at times I am biting my tongue. Every soccer season I cringe when the parents in charge of the snack bring out the individual drinks and individually packaged snacks for everyone. I can't help but do the math in my head - X teams in the town, Y games per season, then multiply this by all of the towns in the state, country - how much plastic is being used on fields each Saturday morning. And that's just one sport!!!! What is wrong with a big jug of something to drink and their reusable bottles (which most kids bring). The communal snack, well, it can be muddy and maybe not the greatest idea for each kid to be grabbing into a bowl, but there has got to be a better way. Each year I say I am going to suggest that kids bring their own bottles to refill, but I don't. I didn't play sports as a kid so I have no idea what was done then.
I am, by nature, much more private and non-confrontational. So putting myself out there is not natural for me. But at this point in my green journey, I feel like I should be more active in educating people and pointing out things they could do. For now, I do it in this blog and Greene Westford column - sort of passive. Maybe that's enough?????
Any suggestions? How do you deal with other people?
I ended up giving in and bought 2 costumes. I consoled myself by remembering that my kids love to play dress up. These costumes would be used many more times. And when they were done, I could donate them to other children to use.
Update: I meant to explain a little more on why I gave in. As I re-read this, people may think my kids were being bratty and I gave in because of that. Not the case. For my son, he rarely asks for anything and is quite happy, most of the time, with whatever he is given. So when he expresses a real opinion on something, I want to listen to him and honor that request when I can. As for my daughter, she is the younger of 2 girls. As soon as she could express herself, she has copied her older sister on everything. As flattering as people might think this is, her older sister did not this flattering. Much tension over this exists. So, when she does express her own interests, no matter how small, I like to recognize and encourage her to be her own person. Now, I probably could have found a way for them to be what they wanted without buying brand new costumes. I did try, but couldn't find used ones and I am not terribly crafty so making them myself wasn't going to happen. So there you go!
There are lots of things my kids do that others may not - we use cloth napkins all the time (even for school lunches), they recycle, upcycle, have reusable water bottles and snack bags, etc. At times though I don't want to risk alienating my children or making them feel they are sacrificing just for my ideas. Of course, I hope these also become their ideas, but they may not.
As far as what other people think, I don't want to become that person. I rarely tell people about environmental issues unless asked. I don't want to come off as preaching even though at times I am biting my tongue. Every soccer season I cringe when the parents in charge of the snack bring out the individual drinks and individually packaged snacks for everyone. I can't help but do the math in my head - X teams in the town, Y games per season, then multiply this by all of the towns in the state, country - how much plastic is being used on fields each Saturday morning. And that's just one sport!!!! What is wrong with a big jug of something to drink and their reusable bottles (which most kids bring). The communal snack, well, it can be muddy and maybe not the greatest idea for each kid to be grabbing into a bowl, but there has got to be a better way. Each year I say I am going to suggest that kids bring their own bottles to refill, but I don't. I didn't play sports as a kid so I have no idea what was done then.
I am, by nature, much more private and non-confrontational. So putting myself out there is not natural for me. But at this point in my green journey, I feel like I should be more active in educating people and pointing out things they could do. For now, I do it in this blog and Greene Westford column - sort of passive. Maybe that's enough?????
Any suggestions? How do you deal with other people?
The commercial "powers that be" make it difficult to live "green", especially when their efforts are often directed at children. And when children want the latest and greatest ... well, it's hard to always say no. This is one of those occasions when we need to balance the non-green with the green ... and I think you've done it beautifully. Perhaps the purchase of costumes wasn't in keeping with your green philosophy but what you will do with the costumes (reuse or share with others) certainly is. And in truth, we want children to learn to love the earth ... not feel it was a burdensome way of life which they'll eventually turn from.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first got enthused about living green, I wanted to tell everyone (and did). And I quickly learned that people don't "hear" until they are ready. I also learned that our actions speak louder than our words ever could. I'm vegan and the other day I was in a store where they were giving out samples of chicken. The woman at the station asked me if I wanted some and I said no thank you. She pressed a bit saying the food was delicious. I smiled and said that I vegan. She quickly acknowledged that and stopped asking. I went on my way and a little latter, when I had to pass by her area again, she moved into the center of the isle so that she could talk to me about my choices. She was interested and it gave me an opening to talk about why I believe a plant-based diet is better for the earth. So, your actions will be noticed and when noticed by someone who is ready to hear, you'll have your opening. And don't minimize the impact of your blog ... people who come to visit will learn a lot from your experiences and your honesty!
Very well said! Thank you for that. I needed to hear it. You are so right about people being ready. If I think back, that is what happened to me. Love your challenges! They always get me thinking.
DeleteI had to smile here, I am the crazy 'gringo' in our neighbourhood. The shopkeeper thinks I am weird because I reuse my three-year-old egg carton because I don't want a little plastic bag, the mini-market owner thinks I am weird because I prefer to buy things in glass, not plastic and I take my shopping bag with me. My neighbours think I am weird because I pick up rubbish in our praça. The local supermarket owner thinks I am weird because I prefer an old carton(s) for my produce and have asked why he doesn't have recycled paper towels and toilet paper; he agrees in principle but adds that their is no profit because the items are so slow to move.
DeleteYou are right, how we are perceived by others is a 'roadblock'. I have explained my actions and they end up agreeing with me, but haven't got a clue why. I will say that now two of my neighbours also use old egg cartons. The local president of the neighbourhood association has arranged for the councilto clean the praça more often because he knows that I can't do it as well any more because of leg restrictions. So, I can say that I have planted seeds.
Kids, now we are on to it. I have raised 12, they all know I am a scrooge, ah, frugal, but can be generous. I buy second hand, I don't buy 'brands' and I buy only what is necessary. They accept that the glasses in the kitchen for everyday use are old cream cheese containers, the water in the fridge is in old plastic bottles and not a fancy jug. They don't question, they accept. I make sure my kids understand the value of things, the necessity to care and reuse. In today's world it is so easy to be wasteful and spoil kids because of peer pressure, I have tried to instill into them that "keeping up with the Jones"' is not necessary. Now that they have grown, since the separation from my last partner, they come to visit and it is gratifying to hear "Pop, have you got an old XXX that I can use/have?" They know that a plea for a new one will fall on deaf ears. I know only too well, that the pressure on kids is enormous and that it seems almost cruel to say no. The Halloween costume change would have been met with, "in that case you don't really need to go". Oh, there would have been tears and perhaps a tantrum, that's a risk. But later a request would be met with "well, you saved money on Halloween, so let's think about it."They then understand that a 'no' can have a positive future.
But that's my philosophy, if you have been to my blogs you will realise that I firmly think the future is not going to be a bed of roses and I hope that my frugality has helped prepare them for the tough days to come, when things aren't available as they are today.
Having said all that, I praise your ideas, they are not always as we would have them. I enjoyed your post because when I wrote mine, peer pressure was not considered; a valuable point.
AV
Thank you AV. It's nice to hear that others have the same struggles. I admire the fact that you don't care that people think "you are weird". Good for you! And your actions have sparked others to act as well. Actually, my neighbors started recycling LOTS more after seeing us do it for years.
DeleteI need to be true to myself. I'm sure there are people out there that think I am strange for doing some of the things I do - like sorting through people's "trash" to upcycle it. But I'm OK with those things. So if I give in once in a while and use paper plates at a birthday party or buy new Halloween costumes for my kids - so be it. I'll get there. There was a time when I felt strange bringing reusable grocery bags - now I bring reusable produce bags and containers for bulk items!
Hi from the Meet and greet! I really hear you on the 'non conformist' roadblock. It's easy to preach to the converted via our blogs (and hopefully we sometimes catch a 'non greenie' in the net too). I guess you never know just how much you are inspiring others by your example. You never know how much a comment made to someone will stop and make them think. So keep on doing what you are doing and good luck with all the purging too - it feels so good doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteRae aka mrsgreen@littlegreenblog
I think a lot of us face this road block! I know I do. I don't talk about it to everyone, but most know that I'm eco-friendly and doing what I can. I don't preach to them but I've been known to take things out of their trashcans to recycle or take things home from their house so I can recycle them, etc.
ReplyDeleteMost people will make fun of me for my ways and beliefs, most are just joking around but they still sting. I try not to show this though.
Currently expecting my first and getting a lot of comments and crap because Husband and I are going with cloth diapering, organic items as much as possible, all natural baby products, planning (hoping!) to breastfeed for a year, and making the baby food from scratch. It's unbelievable the comments people have, and I don't preach. They'll ask about something and I'll just mention "oh, we'll be doing cloth" etc and then they just lay into me. It's hard, it's a road block I face, but I know it's the right choice for my family so I just grin and bear it. Then watch them throw diapers into the trash can and cringe.
Hi Rae,
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to know how much good you are doing. And I do think that leading by example rather than preaching is probably a better way to win people to the green side.
The purging has been great! I still have so much more to do....
Kris,
ReplyDeleteGood for you for doing this with your first baby! I wish I had been that enlightened then. I think about all the disposable diapers we tossed - with 3 kids. Ugh. It makes me sick to think of now. But I wasn't there at that time. And the non-organic, paraben and toxin filled items we used. Can't do anything about it now. Stick to your guns! You child will be much better off.
I did make baby food from scratch. It's not that difficult and I felt much better about it. Plus I think my kids learned to eat more of a variety or foods and not get too stuck in the typical kid-menu that so many do. Once they were old enough, I would figure out what I could cook for all of us, instead of special things for the kids and a separate meal for my husband and I.
Good luck! Please stop in from time to time and let me know how it goes. I'd love to hear about it.